I’ve tried to describe the background leading up to my spiritual crisis in the past several blog posts. Many of the things I discussed were long term, ongoing problems.
The acute crisis emerged from several converging factors during my time at Scattergood Friends School the first week of December, where I was staying while working on the deconstruction of what will become the Healing Justice House at Great Plains Action Society’s Indigenous-led Urban Resilience & Innovation Hub in downtown Iowa City.
An overview of the factors include lack of adequate rest, which was why I spent numerous hours awake each night. The spiritual experiences occurred during some of those sleepless hours. I’d been concerned about sleep prior to leaving Madison. I have a prescription that helps with sleep, because that was usually the cause of migraine headaches. Due to an error at the pharmacy that medicine wasn’t ready to be picked up on my way out of town. So I was a bit stressed by that, especially because I would be doing a lot of very physical work at the Hub.
Being a shy person, I was a little stressed at the thought of the new people I would meet, both at Scattergood and at the Hub. I knew they would be wonderful people, but that added a little to my stress. As expected, I made some great new friends.
Seeing the time capsule that had been recently discovered at Scattergood triggered a lot of memories. (See: Scattergood and Great Plains Action Society Part 1). This photo was in that time capsule. I was looking at a whole different version of myself. Bringing up so many memories from that time, and being back at the very same place where so many things began in my life. Looking at the connections between these times, looking at what I’d done since. Trying to remember what my spiritual and justice concerns were back then. Because such concerns had been at the center of my life then, and since. For example, I helped organize a draft conference at the school during my Senior year at Scattergood. The whole school walked from Scattergood into Iowa City, about twelve miles away, as a peace march during the National Mobilization to End the War Vietnam.

Quaker involvement
I am very glad that Scattergood has been involved with my friend, Sikowis Nobiss, founder of the Great Plains Action Society (GPAS), including hosting Phil and I during our time working on the demolition at the Hub. We had informal discussions with the students and staff at the school, when we weren’t at the Hub. And I was grateful for the chance to discuss the GPAS Hub and the work we were doing there with the whole school during a community meeting on Friday December 5th, just before I left to return to Madison.
But the primary part of my spiritual crisis was related to the absence of anyone else in my Quaker meeting, or Yearly Meeting, coming to help refurbish the Healing Justice Center at the Hub. There were numerous consequences from that.
In the eight years since I retired, I have worked hard to develop relationships with Indigenous people in the Midwest, as I’ve written about in detail. I was led to do this for several reasons, the chief being to build relationships so I could better understand Indigenous peoples and their ways. It was clear that Indigenous peoples had lived in ways to respect and care for Mother Earth. The main path of my life’s work has been related to try to get Quakers and other non-native people to reject the profligate mining, transporting, and burning fossil fuels in this country. This path has been littered with one failure after another. I titled a story that was published “Cars as weapons of mass destruction.”
Indigenous leadership is required
One of the main lessons I’ve learned is the necessity of having Indigenous-leadership for this work. And that is one of the main causes of my spiritual distress, because where are non-native people going to find such leadership? I’ve spent the years since retiring and moving to Iowa developing such relationships. In particular, with Sikowis Nobiss and the Great Plains Action Society.
One way I have done that is by being part of the Decolonial Repair Network (DRN), which was created for this purpose, to provide the way for non-native allies get Indigenous leadership without burdening Indigenous leaders. Because the purpose of the DRN is to support the Great Plains Action Society. To not burden Indigenous leaders should always be kept in mind.

| Reason for Indigenous Leadership | Description of Imperative |
| Necessity of Returning Land Stewardship | Decolonization is fundamentally about returning land to Indigenous people. LANDBACK is a material and political project to restore Indigenous stewardship, sovereignty, and ecological balance. |
| Indigenous Traditional Ecological Knowledge (TEK) | TEK is a living, future-oriented science for sustainable living, regenerative agriculture, and climate resilience that addresses modern crises better than colonial extractive models. |
| Recentering Matriarchal Principles (ReMatriation) | ReMatriation involves ‘Returning the Sacred to the Mother,’ restoring balance by restoring matriarchal governance and reciprocal relationships with the earth. |
| Allies as Accomplices, Not Leaders | Non-Native allies must act as ‘accomplices’ who take direction from Indigenous leaders, amplify Indigenous voices, and focus on material repair rather than symbolic gestures. |
| Rejection of Colonial-Capitalist Systems | Colonial capitalism is seen as a system of fused violence. Decolonial efforts must build ‘dual power’ outside of state/electoral politics through horizontal networks of care. |
| Truth, Reckoning, and Healing Justice | Healing is a prerequisite for liberation. Decolonial work must address intergenerational trauma caused by colonial institutions like boarding schools under Indigenous guidance. |

Decolonial Repair Network
We ask that those who join this network are willing to make the following commitments:
- Contributing ongoing financial support to Honor Native Land Fund, which supports the ReMatriation Fund of the Great Plains Action Society
- Regularly attending monthly learning and organizing calls on the first Wednesday of each month that will focus on learning Indigenous and colonial history, current issues facing Indigenous communities, engaging guest speakers (both Native and non-Native), healing, and networking
- Willingness to confront racism in all its forms, such as racist mascots and cultural appropriation
- Willingness to work to dismantle legal and cultural systems of white supremacy
- Inner transformation and healing the wounds of colonialism within
- Healing land in whatever places we inhabit
- As able, to show up when Indigenous leaders call for solidarity and support